Be Responsible for Your Quirks
1a : a peculiarity of constitution or temperament : an individualizing characteristic or quality
b : individual hypersensitiveness (as to a drug or food)
2 : characteristic peculiarity (as of temperament)
Idiosyncrasies, quirks, perfectionism, styles, preferences, stubbornness, and not wanting to change ways and methods are all traits which set us apart from every other person. I will summarize that list into simply using the word quirks.
Even when someone else might see a more-efficient, or more pleasant, or otherwise better way to go about tasks, actions, and choices, our quirks tend to be our dominant method.
Because our quirks belong to us, our quirks are our own responsibility to manage and accommodate.
Here’s an example: A person is very slow at getting ready for work in the morning, and usually ends up rushing out the door, forgetting his packed lunch and work materials, and speeds to work. The person doesn’t want to eat breakfast faster, to bring breakfast in the car, or to move altogether faster when getting ready. Moving and eating slowly, as well as refusing to eat on the go, could be considered this person’s quirks. There are better, more-efficient, safer (via not speeding and having lower stress), and more pleasant ways to go about getting ready for work and getting to work. But the person either is too stubborn to change or can’t handle changing their mornings.
Rather than expecting himself to change his quirks, the person is responsible to accommodate for his quirks so as to lessen stress for himself and for others (i.e. those who have to observe and/or participate in his chaotic morning routines, or those who are worried about his reckless driving).
A way for this person to be responsible for these quirks could be that he gets everything ready well-before bedtime the night before—including a lunch/work supplies reminder note taped to his car keys—so there is a lot less for him to do in the morning and so he can accommodate taking his time getting ready without rushing out the door, forgetting items and speeding to work.
Here’s another example: A person is a perfectionist about the entry way in her home. She gets really irritated when others don’t line up their shoes to her standards. She ends up being very crabby with her loved ones.
A way for this person to responsible for her quirk is for her to set a time each day when she will organize everyone’s shoes after everyone is home for the day. Instead of feeling resentful towards her loved ones, she can feel like she’s taking care of herself by organizing the shoes in a way that she’s pleased with.
Acknowledge and take responsibility for your quirks and come up with ways to minimize the stress caused by those quirks.
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