‘Saint’ Facade = Unethical Reactions
Most of the really toxic people I’ve known have had a facade of being saintly. And if their facade wasn’t that of a saint, per se, it was of being naive and innocent. And/or being quiet and unaware. And/or being a helpless victim of other’s behavior. And/or seeming to be a do-gooder or peace-maker. And/or an upright, sweet Christian. Actually, all of these facades can make a person appear as a saint, so to speak: seeming harmless and only about goodness.
So, how did I know it was all a facade with these people?
Because of these reasons:
They did not seem to comprehend, relate to, nor care about most ethics and morals.
They were extremely offended if someone wasn’t fluffy-nice, unquestioning, and unconfrontational with them; and they made that person out to be evil.
They had no qualms and showed no mercy about absolutely destroying select persons’ lives.
[reference point 1]My intuition told me that these were people were never to be trusted alone in my home.
[Turns out, this intuitive gauge is extremely reliable for me.]Yet, most (if not all) other people fell for their “sainthood” facade.
[Which makes it absolute hell for the victims of these fake ‘saints.’]
For all of these toxic people, it seemed to be essential for them to keep their saint facade going, at all costs—even if it meant they lied; betrayed; enabled and encouraged harm caused by others; gaslit; stonewalled; trianglulated; cheated; hid; stole; threatened; blackmailed; manipulated; played mind games; tricked; were sneaky, slippery, aloof, and secretive; smeared people’s character or otherwise destroyed their lives.
“The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy”
John 10:10
Woe to the person who notices that they are not saints. Worse yet, the person who calls them out on their unethical or immoral behavior will be sure to pay for it.
I know people who made me pay in very covert, passive-aggressive ways which are always difficult to prove—especially to others who, like the fake saints, also live by moral relativism and dissociation (as such, it makes the victim look crazy and feel completely isolated).
And some of these people were very overt about punishing me—even to the point of disturbing and frighteningly psychopathic behaviors and comments (though, this usually is done in private; but when it’s not, the fake saint is an expert at making it seem like their victim caused it).
It’s as if this is the fake saint’s mindset:
“I need everyone to think I’m a saint in order to cover up the evil inside of me.
And you better not ruin that facade. Or else.”
Being a victim of these people can strongly affect your sense of belonging in this life and your sense of safety in your own life. I know it has impacted my whole life. I wrote a blog post called Stranded and Alone; in it, I explain the tremendous impact these type of people have had on me.
Also, I can recognize very similar behaviors and mindsets out in society, in intuitions and organizations, etc. It’s a big part of what makes moral relativism absolutely destructive: moral relativism is like a free pass for these fake saints.
When someone is playing mind games with you and trying to destroy you and your life, it’s important to remember this: It always boils down to morals and ethics. It is absolutely not immoral or unethical to be upset about being treated unjustly and unethically—as these toxic fake saints would have you believe (see point 2, above). They will always point to your upset about what they do as the cause for all the problems—nothing to do with them. Remember: this is only their projecting their evil onto you, to try to get the focus off of their immorality and lack of ethics.
Oh, if I could give this information (and many of my other blog posts) to my 5-year-old self, my life would have been completely different. But it’s different now.
And I want to help every other person who also has dealt with these trickster saint-wanna-be’s and who has been betrayed and all but destroyed by them.
Please contact me. I’d love to help you.