When Your Ex Cheats with Your Sibling

What should you do with your ex-partner cheats with your own sibling (or anyone else, for that matter; but with a relative is really the bottom-of-the-swamp type of behavior for both parties)?

Cheating is betrayal. It’s essentially is anything done behind your back (or in front of you, too, actually) that is unethical, immoral, and/or otherwise inappropriate—to include:

• any sort of involvement and communication with each other

  • especially if they never met before, or barely knew each other

  • including if the two of them did not have a well-established friendship which you were fully-aware of and part of during the partnership with your ex

  • especially if you hadn’t had contact with the sibling for years because the sibling was stonewalling you (and your ex has known this all along)

• exploiting you

• using data and lies about you as a way to get attention from each other and validate each other’s unethical behaviors

• sharing with each other information which they keep from you—especially information that you should know and have the right to know

• gossiping about you

• smearing your character

• providing private information to the other, about you and the relationship, which you wouldn’t have consented to share with the other

• lying about you

• neither of them asking you for your own side of their stories

  • especially if your kids were involved—the sibling showing lack of care and concern for relatives and for children

What should you do?

Stay away from both of them. Their actions couldn’t communicate any louder:

They are not your kind of people.

For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

Ephesians 6:12

Accept that evil exists in this world. Yes, evil can exist even in your own family members. Yes, evil can exist in people who, over and over, claimed to love you. Yes, evil can exist even in people whose facade/image is that of a “nice” person, or a “calm” and “easy-going” person, or a “helpless- or harmless-seeming” person, or even a “Christian” person. Evil can exist in people who somehow have fooled most other people into thinking they are safe and non-threatening.

In fact, one of the most evil-behaving person I was involved with, used to frequently say, “I’m a good person!” and “I try to be like Jesus.”

We rise above the evil when we stay away from such people; when we do not replicate their malicious intent'; and we tend to our own lives with humility, honor, integrity, morals, ethics, and principles.

Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.

Romans 12:19

Don’t worry, walking away from such people is only a blessing for you. If they didn’t cheat on you with each other, they’d likely do some other sort of malicious acts (looking back, you will probably see that they betrayed you in many other ways throughout the years of knowing them).

It’s a blessing when we are shown people’s true colors. Appreciate the information. And have faith that honorable people exist.

Peace be with you.

Do you need coaching? Please contact me. I’d love to help you.