Willfully-Blind Adult Toddlers
Some people are completely terrified of experiencing anything other than the pleasant, safe stories they’ve created in their mind. This renders them blind to large portions of themselves, their behaviors, their actions, and the people around them. As such, they aren’t able to
make wise choices
listen
learn
grow & evolve
understand
put pieces together
make sense of what is happening outside of their mind-stories
have fulfilling conversations
come up with ideas and trouble shoot
work together
be inspiring
have fulfilling relationships with self and others
be fully present
It’s like dealing with a toddler who hasn’t yet learned to see the big picture and to use logic in order to understand what is happening.
Adults likely established this toddler state due to
interference with their development as a child
severe trauma
little-to-no adult guidance & direction
being raised by parents who also remained in this toddler state
Adults likely remain in this toddler state due to
it being a well-established coping mechanism
it being a method to avoid pain
Whatever it is they refuse to know could hurt them.
it being a method to avoid personal responsibility
Whatever it is they refuse to look at & hear would require emotional, mental, spiritual effort from themselves.
the overwhelm of digging into the problems
doubting there is any other way to live
it allowing for them to take the easy route by having low standards & expectations & having few boundaries
which means their desires & expectations match the immaturity and low-standards and neediness of a toddler as well
thus, allowing them have access to an almost infinite abundance of pleasures to fill their insatiable emptiness
potentially, turning everyone & everything into the role of mommy within their mind-stories
it seeming like they are getting what they they want in life
Of course, they refuse to see that their life meets the standards of a toddler—not as a competent, fulfilled adult.
it guaranteeing their incompetence and being pitiful
it giving them the perceived safety of ignorance
it being a sense of power over others (as a forever-toddler)
If they refuse to see the whole picture, put pieces together & to use common sense, they always ensure that they will get under others’ skin—it’s a way to silence people with very little effort on the adult-toddler’s part.
Since no one can prove the adult-toddler’s willful blindness & this very cruel passive-aggressive power trip, the adult-toddler carries the illusion of being as innocent as a toddler.
forcing others to jump in
to help or save them (i.e. ‘take care’ of them, like a parent caring for a toddler)
to carry the emotional and mental load in relationships, projects & general concern
They tend to be very secretive people since they live from a place of fantasy and mind play—even creating loved ones, & everyone else, as mere characters in their mind-stories.
Thus, they passive-aggressively make themselves unavailable & unreachable to those who love them.
Thus, they don’t really see people as they really are.
And again, they sit confidently & arrogantly with the the fact that no one can prove what they are doing.
They likely turn against anyone who doesn’t buy into their mind-stories & make that person the bad-guy for expecting them to be an adult.
- Leaving that person alone to figure out by themselves how to deal with an adult-toddler & getting flack from the adult-toddler for any struggle in doing so.
Read my next article about how to deal with an adult-toddler if you have to.