Being Duped in a Relationship
I’m going to start a series about being duped in relationships.
I have experience with this and am going to share the covert ways you can be duped by someone you care about.
We always have to see our own responsibility in our being duped. The ability to see potential in another person is likely a big gateway to being duped.
Empathic people have an ability to see things that most do not. Or, at least, empaths are willing to bring awareness to what others won’t be aware of. This includes potential and pain. We can see the pain in another and we have the hope that we are accurately seeing the potential underneath the pain.
Unless this person is an under-age child, stop yourself in your tracks. Your seeing potential underneath another person’s pain is a huge red flag to yourself.
The trap is caring more about someone’s potential more than they do.
If we open our ears and eyes, and shut our mouths, we can easily see if another person is motivated to improve themselves and their lives. A person who is struggling, admits they have a problem, and wants to know how to make things better is someone who seems motivated to reach their potential. At that point, we can ask the person what they want for themselves.
If the person dodges that (or any other) question or is vague, this could be another red flag.
Don’t put more energy into someone else’s healing and growth than they will put into their own healing and growth.
If you are trying to help the other person stay focused on discussions about their healing, if you have to pull teeth to get them to reveal much information, stop it.
If you want to stay involved with this person, keep your mouth shut, and eyes and ears open.
If you want to keep them company in their silence and vague discussions or while they distract themselves, fine. But make sure that you find something to do which inspires you and keeps your own learning and growth moving forward. Don’t just sit there using up your precious time, in limbo.
Be cautious of such a person trying to hold you energetically hostage since they know you are passionate about helping them.
Check out these other articles in this ‘Duped in a Relationship’ series: