Duped: Sensitive Person
Has anyone ever told you that they are a sensitive person? Have you even heard someone say, ‘I’m probably too sensitive to have a relationship’?
If you’re an empath and sensitive person like I am, those words are like butter. Hurray! Finally, a fellow sensitive person!
What do you think of when you hear that someone is sensitive? Maybe you think that the highly-sensitive person
is very sincere
is especially ethical
understands the importance of words & actions
tells the truth
doesn’t waste their time with shallow, superficial relationships
will absolutely take you seriously
is interested in deeply knowing you
will be sensitive about your emotions
wouldn’t disregard your perspective & input
is interested in being deeply known by you
etc.
Don’t jump to those conclusions so quickly when someone uses the word ‘sensitive’ to define themselves. Sure, let your ears perk up. But don’t be duped.
Ask them what exactly they mean by saying they are sensitive. You might get a vague answer. They might tell you what they think you want to hear. Or they might dodge the question all-together.
Listen and watch for
what is important to them
what they choose
how, with whom, about what, & how frequently they communicate & interact
where & in what they put their energy & efforts
how much of a priority they make you
how present, attuned & aware they are
if they trust their gut & intuition
if they are contemplative
if & how much they care about what others think of them (and who those ‘others’ are)
Perhaps what the person actually means by being ‘sensitive’ is that they are
emotionally-immature
entitled
thus, they get sensitive or ‘emotional’ when they don’t get their way
lazy
unwilling to process their emotions
thus, in denial
thus, unstable & lost
needy & desperate
for attention, praise, pity, coddling, to be pleasured, & to be taken care of
from & by you
from & by anyone
Make sure you look at what they are willing to do, or to not do, in attempt to satiate their desperate neediness.
Do they use ‘people pleasing’ or being ‘nice’ as a cover up?
moody
low in tolerance for struggle & emotional discomfort
aware enough of—able to sense—other people’s energy in order to
know who they can use to get needs met
attention, praise, pity, coddling, to be pleasured, & to be taken care of
know how they can use each person to get needs met
attention, praise, pity, coddling, to be pleasured, & to be taken care of
live vicariously through others
use the data for their imagination, grandiose daydreams & fantasies
able to skip over & avoid processing their thoughts & go directly to feeling sensations within themselves
by visual & audio stimuli
by touching objects & things, etc.
via imagination
Check out these other articles in this ‘Duped in a Relationship’ series: