No Longer a Strong Match with Partner

I originally wrote this article on April 5, 2014.

What can you do if you are in a long-time committed relationship, maybe even co-parents with this person, but you find yourself having to compromise a lot of yourself and your desires in order to stay together?

If you want to stay with this person, my suggestion is to keep things peaceful within your home.  Don’t focus on the things you don’t like, but highlight the things you do like.  You might have to get very simple and look for the smallest of things.

Next, use a lot of your home time on your own independent interests.  Create your own refuge space in your home—even if it’s just a corner of a room.

Also, begin to create a social circle of people who are a great match for who you are right now; do things you enjoy together. It’s important that your partner doesn’t feel morally-disrespected by who you pick.

All of these actions will help to take your focus off of your relationship which is less than a match for who you presently are.  Doing so will help you lower your expectations of your committed relationship, without letting go of your own needs and desires.

What if you don’t want to stay with the person, how do you get out?  Check out this blog entry and see if it helps.

Warmly,