Seeing Others as Healthy and Whole

I originally wrote this article on February 20, 2012.

Years ago, my youngest sibling was involved in drug use, dealt with depression, and other unpleasant experiences.  My mom called me to tell me what was going on with him.  I, in turn, called my dad to tell him what was going on with my sibling.

My dad responded with something which completely erased an old belief I had and created a brand-new belief which I’ve chosen to keep all these years later.

My dad said, “I choose to see [my sibling] as healthy and whole.”

Wow.  I’m pretty sure my mouth dropped open.  It never had occurred to me, up until this point, to choose to see someone differently than what the circumstances revealed.  Immediately, all the drama (you know, like the appeal of slowing down to see a car crash) dissipated.

At that moment, I decided to see my sibling as healthy and whole too.   I felt the gift in this for both him and myself.  I saw him with respect, instead of pity. I felt hope that everything would work out. I trusted in allowing him to have his own journey.  He became a free man with one shift in my thinking, and I became a free woman as well.

When we see others as weak, pitiful, sub-par, sick, needing-to-be-fixed, we are making their lives even more challenging.  Then, not only do they deal with their inner turmoil, but they also have to deal with the judgments of others.  Do you know how challenging it is to heal yourself when the people around you don’t believe in you, and when they slap labels on you–requiring you use up even more energy trying to convince yourself their labels aren’t accurate?  It can be done, I’ve done it.  But it certainly isn’t doing the other person any favors!

When you see others as being and doing less-than what you believe they should, you could be doing yourself a disservice as well.  Does it feel good to put your energy into thoughts of despair; does it allow you to freely be your amazing authentic self?

Choose to see others as healthy and whole. Honor their journeys. This blesses yourself and the world around you by creating freedom, space, lightness and ease.

Warmly,