“This is Bad” Versus “It Shouldn’t be This Way”

Have you heard spiritually-minded people state that there is no “good” and no “bad”? I don’t find this mindset to be helpful—especially in the context of morals, but also in the context of validating emotional experiences.

Our resistance comes in the form of thinking something or someone “should not be this way.”

Try stating that something or someone shouldn’t be this way. Do you notice the tension in your body? Do you notice this statement feels like a dead-end?

Now state, “This is happening for a reason. I don’t know what it is right now.”

or

“This person is how he/she is because we all have free will. He/she does himself/herself so well.”

or

“It should be this way because it is this way. There’s nothing I can do to change it.”

With any of those statements, you will notice that the ball remains in your court. Your resistance to “what is” calms down. And then you can focus on what is within your own power. You can focus on what it is you want and work towards that—rather than being stuck in resistance of what is out of your control.

Do you need coaching? Please contact me. I’d love to help you.