Two Parts in All Relationships

As far as I can see, relationships can be boiled down to two (2) parts:

  1. Practical needs

  2. Emotional needs

There’s no way around these two categories. Many people get into and have relationships with others without discussing their practical and emotional needs. I highly-recommend discussions about these needs, their definitions, and living them as real-life examples (walk the talk). Don’t walk into relationships blindly and/or assuming it will all just fall into place when x, y or z happens.

Be sure to be very clear about from where and how you and the others in your life get each of your practical and emotional needs met:

Practical needs can entail any of the following functional tasks and more. Some practical categories can also meet emotional needs due to also fostering emotional stability:

  • earning income

  • managing finances

  • shopping & purchase decisions

  • car maintenance & repairs

  • household maintenance & repairs

  • household chores

  • menu planning and food shopping

  • food prep, cooking, & cleanup

  • errands & transportation

  • heath maintenance and care (food, sleep, exercise/movement)

  • loved ones’ care (children, elderly, etc.)

  • loved ones’ education & activities

  • physical safety for self and family

  • schedules, routines, time management & organization

  • goals and missions

  • task to-do lists

Here are some categories which fall under emotional needs—pertaining to self and with others. Some of these areas simply do not matter to some people.

There are varying degrees of each of these needs. For example, some people want to learn and grow just a little bit (or not at all); others consider learning and growing an on-going, daily and life-long endeavor.

  • learning & growing

  • healing

  • self-awareness and consciousness

  • self-reflection

  • resilience

  • communication

  • transparency

  • honesty

  • authenticity

  • sincerity

  • accountability

  • being known

  • knowing others

  • emotional maturity

  • connection

  • empathy

  • ability to stand alone with convictions and morals

  • self-reliance and independence

  • prioritizing

  • focused and determination

  • inner strength

  • sensitivity

  • compatibility

  • being on the same page, speaking the same ‘language’

  • being relatable

  • sharing of thoughts, ideas, beliefs, interests, perspectives, annoyances, concerns, struggles, experiences, preferences, opinions, passions, gifts, skills, etc.

  • loyalty

  • mutually-made agreements

  • commitment

  • exclusivity

  • reliability

  • emotional protection

  • boundaries (with self, with others, around relationships)

  • clarity

  • simplicity

  • peace

  • fulfillment

  • personal responsibility (in self and in others)

  • motivated and driven

  • passionate about some things

  • discernment

  • vitality

  • heath & well-being

  • sense of belonging

  • being included

  • being invited

  • devotion & dedication

  • trust

  • security

  • vulnerability

  • undertanding of each person’s mutually agreed-upon roles and participation in relationships

  • stability

  • being a priority

  • ability to read & access people, non-verbal communication & situations

  • intimacy and affection

  • brainstorming

  • trouble-shooting and problem-resolution

  • working together

  • collaborating with others

  • intellectual discussions

  • small / light-hearted talk

  • humor

  • companionship

  • socializing (partner, relatives, housemates, friends, co-workers, acquaintances, strangers)

  • time alone

  • entertainment

  • time at home

  • time out in the world

  • time in nature

Do you need coaching? Please contact me. I’d love to help you.

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Automatic “Yes’s” in Relationships

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When I Stop Explaining